Photo by Adrijana (@Adriidas) from Pexels.
Just heard the bells ring, which means, it’s a brand new month, April. A chapter just closed for me and another one begins, I am sure. As relentless as time can be, it just keeps moving forward.
Strangely, my Skagen watch stopped working on a night, two days before my last day of work. I don’t particularly like this watch, but it was a watch I wear often to remind myself to always be better each day, to improve myself. But when it stopped working and when time stopped, as if it was a sign telling me, “Enough, you’ve done enough, Caren.” and that it was time to move on.
I always try to keep moving forward but I can’t help it, unconsciously holding on to the things in the past. Especially things I felt I didn’t do well then, battles that were lost in the past and am still stubbornly trying to fight or prove myself now. I guess that’s why now I feel I have been fighting the wrong battles in the present, then tiring and draining myself out of energy, on the wrong things.
“If you’re tired,
learn to rest,
I’m not quitting, I’m just taking a break. Sometime next week, I’ll be in Korea. Hopefully, still in time to catch the cherry blossoms since it’s Spring. The thought of shopping in Myeongdong, eating my favourite Korean food (I can’t wait to eat Ganjang Gejang, have been craving for this for the longest time!), café-hopping at Garosugil and also meeting and catching up with a couple of friends there, I am looking forward.
“Taking time to do nothing,
often brings everything into perspective.”
– Doe Zantamata
As a friend of mine once said to me before, pick your battles. Firstly, I need to learn to be in the present, then pick and fight the right battles. I need some time off to think about things: what’s important to me, what really matters, what I really want and what I’m going to do next.
I wasn’t feeling very well last evening, had this very bad headache suddenly in the evening and puked. But woke up to such a nice, rainy morning. It’s going to be a slow, cooling and rainy day.